


and it's not even my birthday

by madisonrene



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rimming, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-23
Updated: 2015-06-23
Packaged: 2018-04-05 18:39:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4190724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madisonrene/pseuds/madisonrene
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“So, I have an idea.”<br/>Jordie raises his eyebrows and says, “This can’t be good.”<br/>Tyler smirks before asking, “How do you feel about eating me out?”</p><p> <br/>Alternatively titled: "he tossed my salad like his name romaine"</p>
            </blockquote>





	and it's not even my birthday

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jacksmannequinn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jacksmannequinn/gifts).



> Based on [this tumblr post](http://londonwantsme.tumblr.com/post/109068407125)
> 
> Title from the song "Birthday Cake" by Rihanna
> 
> This is the first full-on pure smut fic I've ever written, so please be gentle. I do appreciate comments and critique as always.
> 
> For Liz because this was basically her idea anyway.

Jordie wakes up with Tyler wrapped around him. He has this habit of tangling himself up in Jordie when he sleeps. Jordie isn’t really even sure if he can move at this point. He tries to roll onto his side to face Tyler, but Tyler grumbles and pushes him back down.

“Babe, I gotta move. Come on, let me roll over.”

Tyler just groans and buries his face into Jordie’s neck. Jordie chuckles and pets his hair, “You are such a child sometimes.” Jordie feels him smile into his neck.

Tyler finally lifts his head a bit and looks at Jordie. He smiles at him sleepily before leaning in to rub his nose on Jordie’s.

“You’re awfully snuggly this morning. What did I do to deserve this?”

Tyler just shrugs and says, “We have the day off. I’m just trying to appreciate it.”

“Mmm, got any grand plans?”

“Thinking ‘bout staying in bed all day,” he looks up at Jordie again, “Wanna join me?”

“I might as well, I’m already here,” Jordie jokes. He runs his hands up and down Tyler’s back, lightly tracking the curve of his spine. Tyler shivers and snuggles into Jordie’s neck again. He starts mouthing at his neck, just under the edge of his beard. Jordie hums in response and moves his hands down to squeeze Tyler’s ass. Tyler gasps into Jordie’s neck before propping himself up on an elbow to look him in the eye. His other arm is wrapped around Jordie’s waist.

“So, I have an idea.”

Jordie raises his eyebrows and says, “This can’t be good.”

Tyler smirks before asking, “How do you feel about eating me out?”

Jordie feels the breath go out of his lungs and he chokes out a feeble, “Yeah,” before regaining enough composure to nod eagerly and say, “Yes. God, yes.”

“Great. You ever done this before?”

Jordie laughs, “Have I ever done this before? Babe, you’re about to experience the best ass eating of your life.”

Tyler laughs at that and says, “I don’t know, man. You’ve got some pretty good competition.” Jordie’s eyes darken at that like he’s taking it as a challenge. He narrows his eyes and says, “I’m gonna fuck you so good you won’t even remember any of those guy’s names.”

Tyler sucks in a breath and Jordie rolls them over until he’s straddling him. He leans down and kisses him, slow and languid. Tyler whines as Jordie presses his fingers into his hips, pinning him down. Tyler wiggles under Jordie as he moves his hands up and down his torso, pausing to run a finger over his nipples. He alternates between pushing his tongue deeper into Tyler’s mouth and sucking on his tongue. Jordie puts a knee between Tyler’s legs on the bed and grinds down on him, needy. Tyler responds by grinding up on Jordie’s thigh, sighing into his mouth as he does it.

They stay like that for a while, making out slowly while slowly grinding on each other. Tyler pauses for a second to reach over and grab his phone. Jordie gives him a look like _are you fucking kidding me Segs why are you on your phone right now??_ , but Tyler just turns on some music and pulls Jordie back down into a kiss.

Jordie breaks away for a second and asks, “Tyler, is this a sex playlist? Are all these songs about fucking?” Tyler nods happily. Jordie rolls his eyes, but goes back to kissing him. Jordie pulls away again and says, “I hope you know you’re a huge dork.”

Tyler grins and reaches down to grab at the waistband of Jordie’s boxers. He starts pulling them off and Jordie slides out of them. He moves down to take Tyler’s off, pausing to mouth at his dick through the fabric. Tyler groans and bucks his hips up. Jordie pushes him back down on the bed forcefully.

Jordie grabs a few pillows and lifts Tyler up. He pushes the pillows under Tyler’s lower back, propping him up. Tyler watches him with lidded eyes, leaning his head back against the headboard. Jordie spreads Tyler’s legs and positions himself in between them. He looks up at Tyler and says, “You sure you’re ready for this baby?”

Tyler looks down at him and whines, “Just fuck me please. I need you.”

That’s all Jordie needs to hear. He moves down to lick at Tyler’s dick, cupping his balls as he does. Tyler lets out a strangled moan and manages to say, “I thought you were gonna eat me out.” It comes out sounding like one word and Jordie has to stop to figure out what Tyler is saying.

He cocks his head to the side and says, “Are you gonna let me do this or do you want to sit there and give me step-by-step instructions?” Tyler holds his hands up in surrender.

Jordie starts sucking on Tyler’s hip, lightly biting at the skin. He moves his hand down to Tyler’s ass, gently pressing the pad of his thumb against Tyler’s hole. Tyler gasps and pushes down towards Jordie’s finger. Jordie tuts and pushes Tyler back up.

“You’re not allowed to move,” he says. Tyler whimpers, but manages a small nod.

Jordie goes back to work on Tyler. He continues to suck on his hip, alternating between biting and licking. He licks his thumb and then presses it back to Tyler’s hole again, lightly rubbing. After a few minutes, he moves his head down near Tyler’s ass. He bites at the fleshy part of Tyler’s ass, sinking his teeth in and continuing to move his thumb across Tyler’s hole. Tyler moans and his hips jerk slightly like he’s trying not to move. Jordie nibbles his way across Tyler’s ass, leaving little teeth marks all over.

“Jordie please,” Tyler begs.

“The more you talk, the longer it’s gonna take.”

Tyler huffs out a breath and sticks his tongue out at Jordie. Jordie responds by biting down on his ass cheek again. Tyler grunts and accidentally kicks Jordie. Jordie makes an ‘oof’ sound and backs away. He catches his breath for a moment and goes right back to work. Using his hands, he spreads Tyler’s legs far apart and leans down, finally licking at his hole.

Tyler gasps at the contact and rocks his hips a little. Jordie reaches up and holds him in place with an arm, continuing to run his tongue along Tyler’s entrance. He continues like that for a while, flattening his tongue against Tyler’s hole and gripping his hips tightly. Tyler’s trying hard not to move and his body shakes with the effort.

Jordie gently presses his tongue into Tyler’s entrance and he squeaks at the change in contact, clenching around Jordie’s tongue. Jordie rubs his hips and Tyler relaxes somewhat, squirming slightly. Jordie presses his tongue in and out of Tyler’s hole, alternating between deep and shallow.

Jordie pauses for a second, lifting his head to look at Tyler. He looks wrecked. His hair is sweaty and mussed; he’s clearly been running his hands through it. His face is flushed and glistening. Jordie finally meets Tyler’s eyes and he almost loses it. His pupils are blown wide and it’s like his eyes are boring into Jordie’s soul. Jordie crawls up to Tyler’s face to give him a quick kiss before going back down. This time when Jordie puts his tongue inside him, Tyler’s hands reach down and tangle in Jordie’s hair, lightly pressing him closer to Tyler’s ass. Jordie considers pushing him away, but he has to admit it feels nice to have his hands in his hair.

Jordie pulls away long enough to suck on his finger, before pressing it into Tyler. He leans down and continues licking, moving his tongue around his finger as he crooks it back and forth. Tyler clenches around him, pressing down onto his finger as far as he can.

Jordie really isn’t sure how much time passes, all he knows is he never wants to stop. He tries different things, adding a finger and then taking both fingers out to get his tongue in again. He tries jabbing it in and out quickly, then moves to slow, purposeful licks. Tyler responds beautifully, grunting and crying out. Jordie swears he sees a tear roll down Tyler’s cheek, but he can’t be sure. Tyler’s hands are grasping the bed sheets, pulling them off. Jordie reaches up and takes one of his hands, rubbing his thumb along the backside of it, all the while still licking at Tyler’s hole.

Jordie accidentally sucks at Tyler’s hole when trying to pull his tongue away and Tyler actually screams his name, writhing underneath him. Jordie smirks at him before leaning back down to suck continuously. Tyler responds by flailing his legs around uncoordinatedly, knocking into Jordie with abandon.

Jaw tired and sore, Jordie decides to wrap it up. He’s pretty sure he’s been at it for more than an hour and Tyler seems to be losing steam. Continuing to lick at Tyler’s hole, Jordie reaches up to jerk Tyler off, grasping his dick firmly. It only takes a few pumps before Tyler is coming and clenching around Jordie’s tongue. Jordie licks him through his orgasm, still gently rubbing at his dick.

When Tyler sprawls back onto the bed, Jordie moves until he’s straddling him again, kicking the pillows out from beneath him. He grasps at his own dick. Tyler reaches up to help and their fingers entwine around Jordie’s dick. He barely lasts longer than a minute, coming all over Tyler’s chest and stomach. He collapses down onto Tyler and lazily kisses his neck. Tyler runs his hands up and down Jordie’s slick back, still dazed.

When they both regain some composure, Jordie props himself up to look at Tyler, “So? What’d you think?”

Tyler laughs and says, “Not bad,”

Jordie pinches his nipple.

“Okay, okay. Best sex of my life. Seriously, no one should be able to do those things with their tongue. That shit should be illegal. So should doing it with that fucking beard, god damn. How am I supposed to sit when my ass feels raw?”

Jordie grins at him, “I told you it would be good. And you know the beard burn was worth it.”

“Babe, it was better than good. It was amazing.”

Jordie kisses Tyler one more time before getting up to get something to clean them up with. He returns with a damp cloth and cleans himself up first. Tyler looks at him with puppy dog eyes, so he ends up cleaning him up too. He tosses away the cloth and snuggles up to Tyler, tucking himself under his chin. Tyler looks over at his phone curiously before picking it up. Jordie looks up at him and sees his eyes go wide.

“What’s wrong, babe?”

“That playlist was two hours long, Jordie.”

“Okay?”

“We listened to the whole thing.”

“So?”

“Babe we just fucked for two hours straight and I’m pretty sure you were eating me out for most of them.”

Jordie manages to look smug before saying, “I probably could have gone longer, but you looked like you were about to die if you didn’t come.”

Tyler rolls his eyes, but leans down to kiss the top of Jordie’s head. Jordie snuggles closer and falls asleep after a few minutes. He wakes up to an empty bed. He reaches out for Tyler, but only finds sheets and pillows.

Sitting up, Jordie looks around the room, but Tyler is nowhere to be found. Tyler usually loves post-sex cuddles, so it’s strange that Jordie can’t find him. Jordie picks up some shorts from the floor and walks out into the house to search for Tyler.

Once he leaves the bedroom, Jordie can hear Tyler singing. Jordie follows the sound to the kitchen. When he reaches the doorway, he stops and admires the sight of Tyler dancing around the kitchen singing Taylor Swift at the top of his lungs. Tyler suddenly notices Jordie and almost falls in the middle of twirling around. He manages to compose himself and looks at Jordie before saying, “Don’t ever tell anyone what you just saw. Also I made you something.”

“Made? What did you make? And how did you do it without burning the house down?”

“I’ll have you know that I can cook I just don’t like to. I like making you do things for me.”

“Okay, okay. Really though, what did you make?”

Tyler points to a tray on the countertop that has something hot pink on it. Of course Tyler would make something pink. Jordie walks over to it and realizes it’s a cake. When he sees what’s written on it, he can’t help but laugh out loud.

 

 

He looks over at Tyler who’s grinning. “You like?”

“I love it.” Jordie walks over to where Tyler is leaning on the countertop. In one movement, he lifts Tyler onto the counter. Tyler wraps his legs around Jordie’s torso. Jordie presses their foreheads together for a moment before leaning in to kiss Tyler.

Jordie hears the front door open and Jamie calls out, “Hello?”

Jordie manages to stop kissing Tyler for a second to yell, “Kitchen!” before turning back to Tyler and reconnecting their lips. Jordie hears Jamie walk in and groan.

“You guys have been having sex all day haven’t you?”

“Not all day, Chubbs. I took a nap.”

“And I made a cake!”

Jamie perks up at that, “Cake? I haven’t had cake in forever.” He spots it on the counter and goes over to investigate. Before Jordie or Tyler can stop him, he’s standing above the cake, mouth hanging open.

“Oh my god, is this for real?”

Tyler is trying not to laugh, “What are you asking? Did your brother eat me out for an hour and a half or did I make him a cake as a thank you? The answer to both is fuck yes.”

Jamie looks up at them, horrified. He whispers, “An hour and a half?”

Jordie nods proudly. Tyler is still grinning.

“You guys are so fucking gross. I don’t want any of your ass eating cake.” Jamie grabs something from the fridge and walks out to the living room. Jordie makes like he’s going to follow, but Tyler pulls him back in with his legs.

“Hey so can we do that again?”

Jordie laughs and says, “Are you sure you can handle that?”

“No, silly. I’m gonna do it to you.”

Jordie mouth gets dry. He turns his head around and yells into the living room, “You’re on your own Chubbs! We’re going for round two!”

They hear Jamie yelling at them as they run upstairs, but neither of them care what he’s saying.

  


**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on [tumblr ](http://dartheighter.tumblr.com/)
> 
> As always, shoutout to [Liz](http://ughhgghg.tumblr.com/) for beat-ing this fic!


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